Lord I’m not fully faithful to You
But I call out” guard, save my life for I am faithful to You”
I cry out reminding You of who you are…but really reminding me of who You are
I cry out for help when I have no right to
Why would you come to me?
Have you not seen? Have you not heard the darkness, the sickness, the disease that rests within my bones?
I say teach me Your ways…but do I really want to learn them and know them?
I pray instruct me in Your ways…but do I really want that- or am I just crying out in need?
God why do you look on me, when You know my sinful heart?
Why do You give grace when you hear my wandering thoughts and see my wandering eyes?
I say that I will give you praise…but You know that I turn that praise into praise of myself, of others, of things, of thoughts, of dreams
You still come…why? Why? WHY DON”T YOU LEAVE ME?!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I am of no value …but You give me value.
I am not holy… but You make me holy
I run…but You come and hold me.
I fall, and curse the ground you place below my feet…and even curse You.
But You speak words of love and words of grace, words of healing.
I am the arrogant fool, I am the enemy of myself, slandering my mind and heart with thoughts and words to de-sanctify the body You’ve provided me with.
You come in and breathe Your breath. Blowing away the distortion.
Healing the ears that listen to the serpent.
Renewing the mind filled with deceit.
Purifying the eyes that burn with darkness, are now cleaned and clear.
Bringing rest to the heart
Speaking, soothing my soul.
OH Lord how You know I am a runner, and wander…oh Praise to You and Your grace. You are GREAT and there is none like You.
Teach me Jesus, teach me. You are good. You are good.
Inspired by: Psalm 86
Thursday, February 10, 2011
Saturday, February 5, 2011
The Top of the Tree
What's at the top of the tree?
Can you see, can I see?
You know who can see?
The Birds.
You know how the Birds see?
Because they fly up to the top.
Why don't I see?
What's up there, what can be seen?
Eyes you so deceive yourself,
you hold yourself from seeing what is above you,
around you, and about you.
Soul you keep yourself,
keeping yourself from feeling the air that penetrates your skin,
that creates breath within.
Look...why do those Birds fly?
Look... what do they see?
How do you fly Birds?
What do you see?
Free... that is how we fly.
Glory is what we see.
Eyes, Body, Heart, Soul... Look up, open your eyes... YES. Its time.
Climb, soar to the top- come see His glory.
We don't know where the climb, the journey, and the flying will take you... but it's Freeing.
To the Top.
Can you see, can I see?
You know who can see?
The Birds.
You know how the Birds see?
Because they fly up to the top.
Why don't I see?
What's up there, what can be seen?
Eyes you so deceive yourself,
you hold yourself from seeing what is above you,
around you, and about you.
Soul you keep yourself,
keeping yourself from feeling the air that penetrates your skin,
that creates breath within.
Look...why do those Birds fly?
Look... what do they see?
How do you fly Birds?
What do you see?
Free... that is how we fly.
Glory is what we see.
Eyes, Body, Heart, Soul... Look up, open your eyes... YES. Its time.
Climb, soar to the top- come see His glory.
We don't know where the climb, the journey, and the flying will take you... but it's Freeing.
To the Top.
Tuesday, January 18, 2011
Filled
Oh!!! how is it that we go through life without breathing, without living, without tasting, without being filled. Dry bones surround us, starvation tries to steal our souls inside. Are you tired body, are you tired bones? Don't fight the hunger...
You, we cry out....don't you hear?!!! Don't you hear how your bones cry out of dryness...out of desperation to be restored? Don't you hear how the depths of your soul are wanting to be filled with warmth, with richness and sweetness? Don't you hear how this depth comes from a hidden place where you need light, where the piece of peace needs to be placed?
Wake up deaf body...wake up deaf mind...you're hungry...you're hungry!!!
You want to eat...your dieing to be filled...but you search and you search, you search...and search...and search. But where do I go?
Your body never stops crying, you know you can be fed...yes you may not know how. But He shows you, He desires you to come.
Cry out body, cry out mind, cry out heart, cry out soul and be filled be filled.
Silence.
Listen...come and listen. Come and listen.
Water runs, food is provide...Free...Free...come and receive.
My soul my soul you are content. My bones my bones your rise strong as the armies do in the desert.
Heart you are enriched. Body you are filled. Satisfied in overflow with all it was meant to be.
Isaiah 55
You, we cry out....don't you hear?!!! Don't you hear how your bones cry out of dryness...out of desperation to be restored? Don't you hear how the depths of your soul are wanting to be filled with warmth, with richness and sweetness? Don't you hear how this depth comes from a hidden place where you need light, where the piece of peace needs to be placed?
Wake up deaf body...wake up deaf mind...you're hungry...you're hungry!!!
You want to eat...your dieing to be filled...but you search and you search, you search...and search...and search. But where do I go?
Your body never stops crying, you know you can be fed...yes you may not know how. But He shows you, He desires you to come.
Cry out body, cry out mind, cry out heart, cry out soul and be filled be filled.
Silence.
Listen...come and listen. Come and listen.
Water runs, food is provide...Free...Free...come and receive.
My soul my soul you are content. My bones my bones your rise strong as the armies do in the desert.
Heart you are enriched. Body you are filled. Satisfied in overflow with all it was meant to be.
Isaiah 55
Ezekiel 37:1-14
Sunday, January 16, 2011
at the end of the day remember LOVE ...
Even in the darkest days and most frustrating days...at the end I feel at peace knowing LOVE stands.
Love is not just an emotion...yes it is for sure full of emotion, but love is so much more.
Love is when you push through hard times, when you don't communicate or communication is just missed because each of the you are tired... but you never stop, you push forth in love and desire to love.. Love never stops.
Love never stops pursuing and pushing forth to love strong to love passionately, caringly, and honestly.
I'm learning what LOVE is...I'm learning what it looks like, sounds like, smells like, speaks like, walks like...who Love is. God has been showing me through my sweet, dear, loving boyfriend what love looks like...and love never gives up.
When we are frustrated with the 2,000 or so miles between us... we state that frustrating in honesty, and how we miss one another and how other couples around us are so lucky to see each other face to face - but at the end of the day we are so thankful for one another and the blessing of each other. There is such a joy and fulfillment as we walk with one another and when we see each other we continue to see love. Even more so just seeing our love... we see God's love. This relationship, gift of love is just a small glimpse of God's perfect love for all of us that is love that is beauty.
In the book of Hosea, Gomer is a prostitute that is pursued by a loving gentleman named Hosea. Gomer is a runner...a runner in life...she runs away from this man Gomer that loves her for her...to the core of her being. Hosea- this man that is pure, caring, kind, and a man that knows love from the direct fountain of love, pursues and loves Gomer strongly. Gomer runs as runners do returning to her old ways, habits - she feels she doesn't deserve Hosea...but more so she doesn't know how to be in love...to be submerged, engulfed taken over in the most beautiful way by true enriching healing Love. The beauty of this relationship comes through the desire and pursuance Hosea has to chase after Gomer and show her in all ways what Love truly is. He never stops running after her to bring her back to safety, to beauty... and back to love. This story is a picture of God and His children, His people, His bride- and His pursuance of us.
I'm a runner like Gomer and my boyfriend is like Hosea continuing to pursue me even if I'm afraid and try to sprint from his loving encouraging words, and even conversation- running from love, because of it's greatness. In all of this running he continue to pursue; He shows me God's pursuance.
In relationships we need to pursue one another- pushing through frustration, pushing through fear, uncertainty and push in love for love.
Love is spoken about flippantly. Love is not just a word but a reaction, action, feeling, relationship- giving and receiving, communication, trust, hope, believing, dreaming, frustrations, weakness redeemed, beauty, its a reality, full, enduring, and ever growing. God is perfect love... He is Love, the essence the being the action, the everything of perfect Love.
In your relationships look at your loved one... see them and remember the push is always for each other. The push, "the climb," draws you to one another, and to the Father...stronger, closer, and deeper in love.
Remember at the end of the day you are at peace...never go to bed frustrated, endure and thrive in this love, this union.
This day remember love is worth fighting for... He fights for you every second. Step out, throw fear to the wayside, walk...walk in Love
Fight to be swept away, submerged, engulfed in true LOVE...you won't be disappointed.
"1 If I speak in the tongues[a] of men or of angels, but do not have love, I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal. 2 If I have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have a faith that can move mountains, but do not have love, I am nothing. 3 If I give all I possess to the poor and give over my body to hardship that I may boast,[b] but do not have love, I gain nothing. 4 Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. 5 It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. 6 Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. 7 It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.
8 Love never fails. But where there are prophecies, they will cease; where there are tongues, they will be stilled; where there is knowledge, it will pass away. 9 For we know in part and we prophesy in part, 10 but when completeness comes, what is in part disappears. 11 When I was a child, I talked like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I put the ways of childhood behind me. 12 For now we see only a reflection as in a mirror; then we shall see face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I am fully known.
13 And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love."
- 1 Corinthians 13 -
Love is not just an emotion...yes it is for sure full of emotion, but love is so much more.
Love is when you push through hard times, when you don't communicate or communication is just missed because each of the you are tired... but you never stop, you push forth in love and desire to love.. Love never stops.
Love never stops pursuing and pushing forth to love strong to love passionately, caringly, and honestly.
I'm learning what LOVE is...I'm learning what it looks like, sounds like, smells like, speaks like, walks like...who Love is. God has been showing me through my sweet, dear, loving boyfriend what love looks like...and love never gives up.
When we are frustrated with the 2,000 or so miles between us... we state that frustrating in honesty, and how we miss one another and how other couples around us are so lucky to see each other face to face - but at the end of the day we are so thankful for one another and the blessing of each other. There is such a joy and fulfillment as we walk with one another and when we see each other we continue to see love. Even more so just seeing our love... we see God's love. This relationship, gift of love is just a small glimpse of God's perfect love for all of us that is love that is beauty.In the book of Hosea, Gomer is a prostitute that is pursued by a loving gentleman named Hosea. Gomer is a runner...a runner in life...she runs away from this man Gomer that loves her for her...to the core of her being. Hosea- this man that is pure, caring, kind, and a man that knows love from the direct fountain of love, pursues and loves Gomer strongly. Gomer runs as runners do returning to her old ways, habits - she feels she doesn't deserve Hosea...but more so she doesn't know how to be in love...to be submerged, engulfed taken over in the most beautiful way by true enriching healing Love. The beauty of this relationship comes through the desire and pursuance Hosea has to chase after Gomer and show her in all ways what Love truly is. He never stops running after her to bring her back to safety, to beauty... and back to love. This story is a picture of God and His children, His people, His bride- and His pursuance of us.
I'm a runner like Gomer and my boyfriend is like Hosea continuing to pursue me even if I'm afraid and try to sprint from his loving encouraging words, and even conversation- running from love, because of it's greatness. In all of this running he continue to pursue; He shows me God's pursuance.
In relationships we need to pursue one another- pushing through frustration, pushing through fear, uncertainty and push in love for love.
Love is spoken about flippantly. Love is not just a word but a reaction, action, feeling, relationship- giving and receiving, communication, trust, hope, believing, dreaming, frustrations, weakness redeemed, beauty, its a reality, full, enduring, and ever growing. God is perfect love... He is Love, the essence the being the action, the everything of perfect Love.
In your relationships look at your loved one... see them and remember the push is always for each other. The push, "the climb," draws you to one another, and to the Father...stronger, closer, and deeper in love.
Remember at the end of the day you are at peace...never go to bed frustrated, endure and thrive in this love, this union.
This day remember love is worth fighting for... He fights for you every second. Step out, throw fear to the wayside, walk...walk in Love
Fight to be swept away, submerged, engulfed in true LOVE...you won't be disappointed.
"1 If I speak in the tongues[a] of men or of angels, but do not have love, I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal. 2 If I have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have a faith that can move mountains, but do not have love, I am nothing. 3 If I give all I possess to the poor and give over my body to hardship that I may boast,[b] but do not have love, I gain nothing. 4 Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. 5 It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. 6 Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. 7 It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.
8 Love never fails. But where there are prophecies, they will cease; where there are tongues, they will be stilled; where there is knowledge, it will pass away. 9 For we know in part and we prophesy in part, 10 but when completeness comes, what is in part disappears. 11 When I was a child, I talked like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I put the ways of childhood behind me. 12 For now we see only a reflection as in a mirror; then we shall see face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I am fully known.
13 And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love."
- 1 Corinthians 13 -
Saturday, January 15, 2011
Stillness
Where has the time of being still gone to?
In the U.S. culture there is a way of life that encourages each person to continue to push forth in their day...each second, each minute...KEEP GOING!!! I continually see those around me filling their days with more and more things do to crossing off of their lists in completion in the end measuring up their "success." Is there something wrong with this picture? What has life become where has peace, rest, and being still gone?
I am one of these people who don't like to be still. By whole being desires to be still to rest and be at peace but it's as though a force tries to keep be going so I don't see the true realities around.
Lately I've been trying to just sit and be still with the LORD but I have a desperately hard time with that. It's difficult to just sit and be ok with the silence. Just as it's difficult for me to not fill the breathing space of conversations with words.
Christ is always present in our lives...but we are not ok with just sitting to listen to Him. The dissonance in music is beautiful, but the dissonance of waiting in life is a bit more challenging.
So what do we do, what do I do? What is in this silence that the LORD is sitting with me in?
It's as though there is an atmosphere of warmth and peace around me...but because I want to push forward I don't sit and enjoy it.
I don't know why God has us, me, to wait and sit and listen to Him in the silence and stillness...
but I think just as when you wake up and take a walk when the town is still asleep, or you journey through nature there is a serene peace that allows you to see clearer and to finally breathe.
If you find yourself in this place know you're not alone...just be still as the dissonance moves about you and enjoy this season as the Lord coats you in His grace.
Know your success doesn't come from doing, life is more then a schedule...take time and sit.
Silence and stillness contains sweet mysteries.
"Be silent before the Lord and wait expectantly for Him..." Psalm 37:7
In the U.S. culture there is a way of life that encourages each person to continue to push forth in their day...each second, each minute...KEEP GOING!!! I continually see those around me filling their days with more and more things do to crossing off of their lists in completion in the end measuring up their "success." Is there something wrong with this picture? What has life become where has peace, rest, and being still gone?
I am one of these people who don't like to be still. By whole being desires to be still to rest and be at peace but it's as though a force tries to keep be going so I don't see the true realities around.
Lately I've been trying to just sit and be still with the LORD but I have a desperately hard time with that. It's difficult to just sit and be ok with the silence. Just as it's difficult for me to not fill the breathing space of conversations with words.
Christ is always present in our lives...but we are not ok with just sitting to listen to Him. The dissonance in music is beautiful, but the dissonance of waiting in life is a bit more challenging.
So what do we do, what do I do? What is in this silence that the LORD is sitting with me in?
It's as though there is an atmosphere of warmth and peace around me...but because I want to push forward I don't sit and enjoy it.
I don't know why God has us, me, to wait and sit and listen to Him in the silence and stillness...
but I think just as when you wake up and take a walk when the town is still asleep, or you journey through nature there is a serene peace that allows you to see clearer and to finally breathe.
If you find yourself in this place know you're not alone...just be still as the dissonance moves about you and enjoy this season as the Lord coats you in His grace.
Know your success doesn't come from doing, life is more then a schedule...take time and sit.
Silence and stillness contains sweet mysteries.
"Be silent before the Lord and wait expectantly for Him..." Psalm 37:7
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